Ewwwwww

Ok, a little backstory. Last night, my friend and I were out and I thought some guy was cute, he got a bit closer and she said he was a geek. Well..I like geeks. Pale skinned, dark haired guys, with above average I.Q's and blue, grey, or green eyes and I melt - oh, and above average genitalia is a must too...But, what can I say? Size does matter! Anyway, she started teasing me, so I teased her back a bit and it was as if a lightbulb went off over her head when she suddenly proclaimed, "You always attract freaks!" Yeah, like the time the guy with the goiter started humping my back when he wanted to "dance". Another time there was a guy who was about 70 something years old who kept trying to give me a massage, literally dragged me onto the dance floor where he promptly fell over (I just walked away and left him there). Then the next time we went back to that particular place he kept telling me we had had sex...

1. 1) I'm usually the designated driver with that friend because she has no car and I've never really gotten drunken enough on water to screw some stranger
2. 2) I don't tend to have one-night-stands with 70-year old men and
3. 3) EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

Anyway...after the trip down memory lane I got up this morning and noticed some weird men had sent me IM's in Yahoo Messenger. So I decided to check profiles - it's always interesting in that trainwreck sorta way, kind of like watching Jerry Springer. Well...Please let me introduce you to Carpet Man and no, it's not some carpet-muncher-oral-sex kind of thing. Seriously, I think I will put down the Yahoo freak of the week on here. I've gone back to staying in perpetual invisible mode unless I see someone I know online. And..well...Carpet Man, and men like him, are the reason for my reclusion.