7/24/2004
I'm Still Alive
Ok, I just got home. That was a fucking weirdass date, and I have an interview in a few hours so I have to go to bed. Just wanted to get this out so no one went calling the police.
I do NOT think I will be seeing this guy again. Genuinely sweet guy and very gentlemanly - opened doors, pulled out my chair, etc , but..well he's 22, and a bit too immature for me to deal with...and he grossed out too easily when I farted (didn't gross him out enough though). I am so not into the juvenile hand holding, "can I kiss you, yer so purty" thing. And he kept STARING at me...I saw him out of the corner of my eye. I don't care what anyone says, it always makes me think the guy is a homicidal maniac (especially since I don't make much eye contact). Then the basically begging for affection and having weird passive aggressive temper tantrums when I wouldn't kiss or hold his hand...well..I did smack him a couple of times. I'm not a cuddler, a "hold me", "kiss me and tell me that you love me" kinda girl. I just wanna watch porn, eat pizza and jump you in the middle of the night cause I'm spontaneously horny, have an intelligent conversation about some esoteric topic where no one can prove they are right or wrong, roll over and fall asleep kinda girl. Ok, well I do the "hold me" crap when my cramps get bad...but, that's about it, except for one guy I was with. He was the only one I could actually fall asleep if he was cuddling with me. Anyone else I waited til they fell asleep, rolled over, and created a blanket/sheet barrier from skin-to-skin contact.
I just feel REALLY bad, cause he didn't have that much money and spent most of it on me today, and I left making a bunch of excuses when he asked if we would get to see each other again soon. Told him I had nerd day, and maybe a family obligation or two, and since I didn't know when/where I'd be working I couldn't make any promises; at which point he said he could take the bus out to my city (has no car, typical in Chicago) and I know I had that deer trapped in headlights look. I don't even remember what the fuck I said, I just tried to run away. I was so addled he even got a kiss after I got into my car and tried to slam the door on him.
Gawd....will I EVER find a guy with the qualities I'm looking for? Or will they all be sorta...well, freaks, psychos, or completely adoring guys who are just not my type? Can't there be a completely adoring guy who IS my type out there??? I mean intelligence, sense of humour, honesty, ambition, and physical attraction....jesus are they that hard to come by?
Ok, maybe I know what my friends mean by my being picky: I can't deal with people I can't hold conversations with, nor can I deal with ugly people touching me..cept for friends during my graduation party. *snickers and ducks*
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7 comments:
Alright... I still have his information if you do turn up missing sometime in the next two weeks. I'm still calling the cops. hehehehe.
Glad you're still alive! I didn't realize he was still a youngin'. Keep this in mind, the younger they are the more you can train them! (hiding from Contagion)
-Nessa
I was actually thinking that. I mean, the weird little things I would casually mention he remembered, and he did things. Case in point, two days ago I called his cell phone and couldn't get him so I mentioned him needing to set up his voicemail. So, when I called on Friday, it was set up. And he was definately attentive and seemed like he'd pretty much do almost whatever was in reason to make me happy. Not sure if it's smacking on desperation or what. Just creepy to me. But I'm not sure if that's because of my intense paranoia or what. I guess some people CAN feel attached/closer to someone they have talked to for 5 months to the point that a first date seems to be the beginning of something more than...well...a normal first date. But, you know me, it takes a damned long time for me to warm up to anyone.
Wait. You've been talking to him on-line for 5 months? Yeah, the kid was already smitten with you, if that was the case! He had already formed some sort of attachment to you. Who knows what he was thinking. Maybe that you can save him from himself. Who knows.
From what he said before he said no other girl has made him laugh so much. He also likes my intelligence. I think there were a few other things mentioned, but I was running on 2 hours of sleep.
I am sort of thinking MAYBE, just MAYBE I should give him a chance for like a month and THEN make a decision. I just don't want to hurt him if he gets even more attached and my feelings in the matter have not changed.
All I am saying is not to let first impressions cloud your judgement, sometimes people turn out to be ok after you get to know them. If he still creeps you out after 3-4 dates, then cut the chord quick and change your phone number .
Jay
That's a great story. Waiting for more. » »
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